Cowboys and Indians
by bella-romeo
Summary: what happens when some producers go to south park? read on to find out! please reveiw DISCLAIMER I DONT OWN SOUTH PARK
1. Chapter 1

BEEP, BEEP, BEEP! The alarm rings furiously Stan rolled over in his bed blinking at the furious clock that continued to ring. He lazily swatted it a few times but missed. "Shut that fucking alarm up! Turd!" Shelly screamed. He smiled at least the alarm pisses her off. It didn't bother him that much, he'd got used to loud noises, mostly because he had Shelly as a sister and fat ass Cartman as a friend…

"Turn the God damn alarm OFF!" shelly screeched. Stan sat up and rubbed his eyes. With one accurate tap the alarm was silenced "your welcome" he muttered. If only it was that simple to shut other things up he thought with a smile. He jumped out of bed and got ready for school. He quickly took off his pyjamas and replaced them with baggy blue jeans, a white t-shirt with red sleeves and for once a pair of black socks.

He ran downstairs nearly running in to his Mom. "Stanley, watch…" Sharon shouted but he swerved out of the way, that was the beauty of being the quarterback, his speed and ability to almost dodge everything. "Way ahead of you Mom" Stan laughed. Sharon shook her head and smiled. He ate his breakfast quickly and brushed his teeth. Nearly done he thought as he tied his trainers. He grabbed his brown fake leather jacket (because he didn't believe in killing animals and wearing their skin) and finally his favourite, lucky blue and red bobble hat. Done he thought as he ran out the house to the bus stop.

As Stan drew closer to the bus stop he saw someone already standing there, he recognised the green hat, trousers and orange coat and ran to greet him. "Hey Kyle!" Stan shouted Kyle heard and waved "hey dude"

He stood next to his best friend. Kyle looked completely different he was a few inches taller but way skinny whereas Stan was toned from playing so much football but Kyle preferred to study which was why he was skinny but also one of the cleverest kid in class. Kyle had dark green eyes and a Jew fro- a ginger afro named after his Jewish decent. Which he tried to cover with his hat. But Stan had lazar blue eyes and short black scruffy hair.

"Hey fags" a voice shouted

"Shut up fatass!" Kyle and Stan said together as they saw fatass aka Eric Cartman walking towards them. His name explained him, he was shorter than Stan and extremely fat his large stomach covered by a red coat and he wore brown trousers. His brown eyes glared at them "Oi don't call me fat, I big boned!" Cartman shouted.

"No you're just fat" someone else said bluntly

"Nice Kenny" Stan laughed. Kenny smiled; his face was nearly completely covered by his orange hoodie that was his trade mark but tuffs of his blonde air stuck out. He wore his orange tracksuit bottoms to match his hoodie. His light blue eyes lit up as he heard the laughter. "Shut up Kenni, your, you're so poor that your mamma can't afford any other clothes!" Cartman shouted with a satisfied smile.

"Weak" Stan muttered to Kyle who nodded. Kenny stood next to Cartman he was the same height as Stan and was medium build; he was easier bigger than Cartman. "He's gonna get it now" Kyle said excitedly hoping that Cartman was going to get his ass kicked in.

"No shit Sherlock! Did ya figure that out all by yourself?" Kenny replied. Stan and Kyle roared with laughter and Kenny joined in. over the years Kenny had raised above Cartman's insults and Cartman hated it. So he fell silent as he sulked. The bus pulled up and all the boys got on.


	2. Chapter 2

"Dude it's packed in here!" Kyle shouted as they were all squished on the bus the others nodded. "Thanks captain obvious" Stan muttered under his breath. They all looked around for a seat "screw this" Cartman said as he made his way to his usual sear. "Move fag!" he shouted at the boy in his seat, he took out his headphones and glared at him, he stood up and was way bigger than Cartman and a lot stronger "Hugh?" the kid grunted. Cartman's eyes widened with horror as he slowly backed away, the boy sat down and continued to listen to his music. Cartman made it back to the others and gave a sigh of relief. "Stupid fatass" Kyle muttered

"Hey Eric, Eric" a little voice shouted. It was Butters and he was sitting down and pointing to the free set next to him. Cartman smiled "screw you guys, I'm sitting down!" Kenny rolled his eyes but then ran over to a free seat next to Kevin. Kyle looked around and saw a free seat next to a third grader and took it. "Weak dude" Stan said to himself as he was now on his own. He scanned the bus for a free seat. Yes. He had seen one and pushed his way to the seat and quickly took it. A girl who was also after the same seat glared at him. "Too slow" he mocked, the girl rolled her eyes. The person next to him giggled. "Such a gentleman!" Stan turned to see who he had sat next to. Don't preach to me he thought in his head, yeah that was a good smart arse comment. But when he saw who it was he stopped dead in his tracks.

"Wendy" he said. His heart started beating faster as his brain took in who it was. Wendy sat there smiling at him. She was wearing her usual outfit: dark purple hoodie, yellow skinny jeans and a pink beret perched perfectly on her long silky black hair. Her unusual grey eyes were staring into his…

"Uh Stan? You okay?" Wendy asked as she looked at him, he just sat there, he seemed spaced out. She took the opportunity to admire him. She gave him a quick look up and down. Wow, he's even more handsome than I remember she thought.

He was still spaced out and she was getting worried, she clicked her fingers in front of his face "earth to Stan, come in Stan" he blinked and snapped back into reality. She smiled "thought I lost you then" she laughed slightly. He blushed, clearly embarrassed, God he's so cute when he's embarrassed. "Sorry" he mumbled "just kida…"

"Spaced out" she said, he nodded and smiled too.

Way to go dumb ass! Stan thought the girl you like is right there and you acted like a total idiot. There was an awkward silence so he tried to break it. "So…. How come the bus is so crowded?" that was good he thought to himself that should distract her.

"Oh, well the other school bus broke down so the school thought it would be clever of they crammed us all together" she replied.

"Hum, cosy" he looked at the girl he had mocked earlier. They both laughed. I've missed this he thought. They hadn't spoken or even seen each other since the breakup, he was meant to hate her, that was what he showed on the outside in front of everyone but the truth was he was still crazy for her.

"It's been so long" Wendy said, she had missed him so much. But she never went over to talk to him because she figured that he hater her she never tried because she was scared of his response. "Yeah it has" he replied stretching his arms she watched him longing for them to be around her. "So how's life been? Since" he never said breakup.

"Not much" that was truth she thought, he looked hurt and turned away "seriously" she continued "no-one else seems to have adventures here, haven't met anyone else who's friend had an anal probe!" he smiled at her and they both laughed.

"Well me and the guys always end up in something! Sorry for dragging you it to most of them" he smiled

"Don't, I enjoyed them" she had missed the crazy adventures together. The bus stopped.

"Damn that was fast" Stan said trying to hide his disappointment, he had more questions to ask, looks like they'd be left unanswered. "Yeah, will I see you around?" she asked

"Defo" he smiled back and he beamed at him, he walked off and met up with Kyle, Kenny and Cartman and walked into school.


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors notes: hey sorry this is not really a chapter but it didn't fit in any others so I put it on its own, so just a filler really.**

Bebe saw her friend get off the bus and she ran to see her. "So did he talk to you?" she asked.

"Hi Bebe"

"Oh, hi, so did he talk to you?" Bebe had been dropped off to school and saw her best friend on the bus and now she needed answers. Wendy smiled dreamily and nodded a little. "Tell me everything!" she eagerly said.

"Dude what the hell!" Kyle shouted after his best friend had told him everything. "Why would you even sit there?" he glared at him

"I didn't know it was her! I, I just sat down on a free seat!" Stan shouted back. Kyle rolled his eyes, not again.


	4. Chapter 4

"Sit down and shut the hell up!" Mr Garrison shouted at his rowdy class, who were paying no attention to him. "Were in sixth grade now so stop acting like total retards!" everyone sat down.

"Why do we have this fag again" Cartman muttered Kenny smirked.

"Okay class, now listen to me, were going down to the gym" everyone groaned. "Principle Victoria needs to talk to you"

"AUGH!" Everyone said in unison. They all got up and started to move.

"What it is it now?" Stan groaned.

Cartman looked around "whatever it is, it wasn't me!"

The class walked into the gym and Stan saw Mr Macky the school councilor, who couldn't say a single sentence without saying M'kay in it. Principle victoria was next to him. "Oh shit dude!" Kyle suddenly said.

"What" Kenny asked, they all looked where Kyle was looking to see all of their parents at the back of the gym.

"What the hell!" Stan said looking around as he spotted the mayor of South Park walking over to the principle.

"What have you guys done now?" Craig asked.

"Nothing!" Cartman shouted, Craig raised his eyebrows

"Yeah right every time something happens you guys are always in the middle"

"Seriously!" Stan said defending Cartman something he only did rarely "we aint done anything" Craig still wasn't convinced but he dropped it and walked away.

The class was standing in the middle of the gym and he saw Wendy looking around as well taking in everything as she usually did, while standing next to Bebe and Red. He was about to walk over when principle Victoria silenced everyone and he stood still waiting to hear what was going on.

"Now children" the principle said "we have got you all here as the mayor would like to tell you the great news!"

"Were finally getting rid of the Jews" Cartman shouted hopefully.

"Shut the hell up, fatass!" Kyle shouted back

"no Eric, I'll let the mayor explain" the principle continued, the mayor walked forward and got ready to address everyone "thank you principle Victoria now I have exciting news that will help this town"

"Oh uh" Stan muttered this would not be good, it never was, just a wacky plan that nearly destroys the whole town or even the world!

"The producers of a reality TV show have called and would like to make a show involving you" she pointed at the class "sweet" Cartman whispered. There was an outbreak of excited chatter, while the parents stood amazed. "the forms are on the table at the back of the gym, parents need to fill them out if they want their child to participate" every child ran to their parents and dragged them to the table, all except Stan who slowly walked to his parents "wow can't wait to see this" randy said excitedly

"Oh, my boy on telly!" Sharon smiled and hugged her son. Stan pushed back

"Uh, I don't want to be in it" he muttered

"WHAT!" Sharon and Randy shouted at the same time

"It sounds really, really gay, I don't want to do it" Stan repeated again, Randy had his mouth open staring at him, while Sharon shook her head "everyone is begging their parents to let them go and your begging us not to!" Stan nodded "well I don't care this is a once in a lifetime chance, i'm not going to let you miss this" Stan groaned he was about to detest but was silenced "I'm going to fill the form out now" she said and walked off followed by his dad. Kyle ran over to Stan "dude this is so cool, and here we were thinking were in trouble!"

"Wait, you want to do this?" Stan was surprised at his friend

"Yeah dude, this will be so cool" Kyle replied

"I don't think so"

"Augh man, you're not gonna become a cynical asshole again where everything is shit!"

"No, but don't you just know something is going to happen that will be totally fucked up. We do live in South Park remember!"

"Whatever dude, looks like you're doing it anyway I can see your mom filling out the form!" Kyle said and then walked away. Stan put his hand to his face and pinched the top of his nose and shook his head. "You okay?" he turned around saw Wendy and immediately stopped

"Yeah I'm fine" he lied

"You're such a bad liar! Now what's wrong" she asked looking straight into his eyes and soul. He felt weak. "How did you do that?" he asked. She looked away

"Well because you pinched the top of your nose and shook your head, you only do that when you're unhappy" she blushed at the fact that after so long she still knew his habits.

"You got me" he said defeated "I'm not happy about this"

"What?"

"This, you know the hole TV thing"

"Why?"

"Because something is going to happen because we live in South Park and something always happens"

"Augh, I see" she nodded

"Wait, you do" he asked "you don't think i'm a cynical asshole?" she laughed and shook her head which made him smile "well looks like there's going to be a crazy adventure after all" he smiled perhaps this wouldn't be so bad.


	5. Chapter 5

On the bus

"Dude this is gonna be great" Kyle said excitedly

"Yeah" Kenny agreed

"Totally kick ass, I'm on TV" Cartman boasted

"Well not all of you, your too fat to fit in one shot!" Stan said, while the others laughed bar Cartman. He'd warmed up to the idea of the show because as Wendy said it would be an adventure. The whole reason he was doing it was so he could talk to her.

"Does my hair look ok?" bebe asked, Wendy rolled her eyes

"For the millionth time YES!" bebe smiled

"Just checking" Wendy looked at the back of the bus and saw Stan and co, bar Cartman laughing, probably a fat joke Wendy thought with a smile.

"Wendy, Wendy!" Bebe shouted dragging her attention back to her friend.

"WHAT!" Wendy shouted back angrily, bebe smiled

"What were you doing?" she asked innocently. Wendy blushed

"Nothing"

"Oh really?"

"YES!"

"So you weren't perving on Stan?" Wendy blushed even more

"How can it be "perving" when were the same age? He is actually a few months older. Perving is when…"

"Okay, get the picture. No-one likes a smart arse!"

"Yeah you just like Kyle's hot ass!" this time it was Bebe's turn to blush

"Touché"

"Oh bien!"

"That's all the French I know!"

"Me too!" they both laughed and dropped the subject

At the school – gym

"Everyone shut up!" Mr Garrison shouted as the class fell silent "now listen you little fags" he continued "don't be little dickheads around the directors, don't mess this up for the town, or else" he threatened, he was about to continue his little speech when three men walked in "hello South Park students!" the one said with a cap on, he was little and fat, the one next to him was tall lanky and had a ponytail. The third had messy hair a beard and just generally looked, odd. "My name is ted" he continued "this is Greg" pointing at the lanky guy "and this is Fred" pointing at the odd guy.

"Oh uh" Stan said quietly.

"And together we are the three d…"but ted was interrupted by Cartman

"Dildos" everyone burst out laughing

"Eric you son of a" Mr Garrison shouted but was silenced by ted, the class fell silent. Ted burst out laughing "no directors, you must be Cartman, we've heard a lot about you" he smiled "can I see Eric, Kyle, Kenny and Stan please" they all looked at each other and wore worried expressions as they stood up and walked down to ted "good idea" Mr garrison said "get rid of the trouble makers" as the four walked off with ted.

"I hope they're going to be okay" Wendy whispered to bebe.

In an empty class room:

"So" ted said. The boys looked at each other "you're the famous four!"

"What" they all said

"We've been reading your reports about what you've done and we love it. I mean Cartman when you created a Mel Gibson fan club and tried to exterminate the Jews"

"Oh that was nothing" Cartman said, flattered

"Hey!" Kyle shouted

"Augh and Kyle remember when you were the first human-centi-pad?" ted said

"Weak" Kyle muttered, Kenny laughed

"And Kenny or should I say mesterion? South parks super hero"

"Thanks" Kenny said

"and finally Stan Marsh" Stan just stared at him "saving the calves, whales and your friends and family, your quite the saviour" Stan still looked at him "look the bottom line is, we want you on our show"

"Well duh" Stan said "we already know, we signed up, well my parents signed me up!" Cartman pushed Stan "erm don't listen to him, he's just a cynical arsehole, please continue" Stan glared at him "oh, this is going to be great, I can just tell" ted said excitedly "well remember when you all called the police and said your parents molested you?" they all nodded except for Stan who was still furious "well the town got split in half and you ran them except for Kenny"

"Oh that's caus I was killed" Kenny said "it happens a lot" the others nodded but ted looked blankly at him "yes well; we want to do that, the whole war and everything, like cowboys and Indians"

"Sweet" Cartman said

"The class will be split in half and you two will be the leaders" ted pointed at Cartman and Stan. Kyle and Kenny moaned, Cartman's smiled widened. "No!" Stan said "I'm not doing this shit!" ted looked at him

"Yes you are"

"I'm sorry let me spell it to you N, O spells NO!"

"You have to" ted repeated holding up Stan's form "it you have to or else…."

"Are you threatening me? Or what! You'll banish me, that's already happened when I refused to vote and nearly got killed by P-Diddy, but I guess that's on my file"

"Yes it is, interesting story, so if you refuse we will sue this shitty little town for everything, win and then get everything knocked down, how that?" Stan went red with rage and had a massive urge to beat the shit out of him. "Well that's all you need to know go back to the gym and meet your groups" ted smiled letting them out.

"Son of a bitch!" Stan shouted.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's notes: hey, back again! I can't believe I forgot about this story! I was just caught up in my other ones. I also lost my book that has the story written in and consequently had a major panic attack, but all is good I've found it again :) so here we go again… **

In the gym

The class looked at the boys as they re-joined them. Straight away Cartman started boasting "oh yes i'm gonna be a leader of you fags" he laughed

"No you're not" Craig said

"Yeah"

"No way, why would they want a fat fuck like you for a leader" and Craig flipped him off

"Hey! You will respect my authoratai!" Cartman shouted and the two started arguing. The rest of the boys walked over to Kenny and Kyle to ask them. Stan hung back and bebe walked over to him dragging a reluctant Wendy with her, who was trying to break free. "Hey Stan" bebe said, Wendy stopped

"Uh hey"

"So is it true?"

"What?"

"That monkeys are real!" bebe said sarcastically "God you're so thick! Is Cartman going to be a leader?"

"Afraid so" he said ignoring her insult

"Damn so who's the other?"

"Umm me" bebe raised her eyebrow

"Humm that's interesting" she ran back to report back to the other girls leaving Wendy behind, she was about to walk away when she turned back round

"So, you're a leader" she asked him

"Yup" he said casually

"That's cool, at least we have one good leader" she smiled "Stan are we okay?" she looked serious but Stan was confused

"What dya mean?"

"Well, I'd like us to be friends" she kicked the ground "caus I miss us hanging out, it, it was fun" she admitted and looked away.

"Of course!" Stan said eagerly "I'd love to be friends!" she beamed at him

"Great" she hugged him who made him go bright red, he didn't move not wanting to ruin this perfect moment. She released him and went red too "oh sorry, got caught up in the moment"

"It's cool dude" she was still red and ran back to the girls who were all staring at her. He smiled. "What the fuck!" Kyle shouted

"What dude!" Stan shouted back

"What was that about?"

"None of your business!" Kyle just stared "fine she just said she wanted to be friends and I said yes! What's the big deal?"

"Just checking, now come on the three dildos are coming back" they both laughed. Stan had to admit that it was funny. Cartman did have his moments.

"Okay quiet please!" ted said "now can the two leaders come forward." Cartman pushed his way through, head held high. Stan just walked around the side "Eric Cartman is one leader and Stanley Marsh is the other" Stan rolled his eyes which made the class laugh "now we need to group you" everyone looked at Stan "now it needs to be fair" ted continued noticing that everyone wanted to be on Stan's side "so I think that ill choose" everyone groaned "please for the love of God don't put me with Cartman" Kyle pleaded a few others did the same. "Stan you can choose one person" ted said "takes some….."

"Kyle" Stan said instantly. Kyle cheered and ran over to him

"Thank you, thank you dude!" Kyle rejoiced and hugged him.

"Hey I didn't want the Jew on my side anyway" Cartman shouted but Kyle was too happy to care. "Now you choose Eric" Cartman looked around at all the worried faces that turned away from him. All bar butters who was smiling. "I may as well have butters" Cartman muttered. Butters ran over and smiled while everyone gave a sigh of relief "okay now we'll choose" ted said

"Noo" bebe cried and Wendy just stared at her.

"Kenny Stan"

"Yes!"

"Jimmy Cartman"

"F-f-fuck me!"

"Kevin Stan"

"Wahoo"

"Timmy Cartman"

"Timmy!"

"Token Stan"

"Okay"

"Tweek Cartman"

"AUGH!"

"Craig Stan"

"Thank you"

"Clyde Cartman"

"Noo!"

"Rebecca Stan"

"Yes"

"Wendy Cartman"

"SHIT!" Wendy moaned she never usually swore only when she was upset and she was now, she looked like she had just received the death sentence

"Augh man I got the hoe" Cartman moaned

"Hey don't call me/her hoe fatass" Wendy and Stan shouted at the same time, they both looked at each other. Wendy was flattered that Stan stood up for her, guess he really was a gentleman but she couldn't tell if Stan was red from anger or blushing when the class looked at him. "What" Stan shouted and everyone went back to normal.

"Dude, chill" Kyle whispered

"Hadi Stan"

"Yeah"

"Bebe Cartman"

"Well at least I'm with Wendy" she shrugged and walked over

"Lola Stan"

"Cool"

"Anne Cartman"

"Oh no!"

"Mille Stan"

"Yes!"

"Okay" ted clapped his hands "next stage"

**Ta-dah, hoped you liked it, please review and tell me what you think. Hopefully I will update again soon; unless my book goes walk-about again; but it can't hide forever!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's notes: wooh! My book never ran away from me! Yet, so now you know the groups. But guess what? I lost my fucking memory stick! Had a fit and couldn't find it for days. But I have it now so all is good. It seems like fate really doesn't want me to continue with this story! Well anyway read on to find out what the groups enjoy…**

"So team Cartman stand on the left and team Stan on the right" ted said they did as they were told. Stan caught Wendy's eye and they shared a quick smile before looking away before he went red. Ted walked over to the right hand side followed by Fred. Greg walked over to the left "looks like you guys drew the short straw" he said

"What?" red asked

"Yeah aren't we lucky caus we aint on fatass' team" Kyle said and the others agreed looking at the sad faces at the other side of the gym. "No because their the cowboys" Greg replied

"What the hell is going on?" Stan asked "and you can cut the crap" Greg moved away

"Well" he continued "it's kind of like cowboys and Indians"

"What?" mille asked

"There are two teams and one side is like the cowboys that get cool stuff and help and you guys are the Indians that get no help or cool stuff. It's like that wacky molestation adventure you lot had, Cartman's side was all clean but you" he pointed at Stan "had the uncivilized ones, you were all dirty and in torn clothes"

"So basically were fucked" Craig said bluntly

"On television" hadi added

"Hey no were not" Stan said

"But were the uncivilized ones" Kevin pointed out

"So what cowboys were dickheads!" Kenny shouted

"That may be but they wiped out the Indians" Kyle replied "remember"

"well, let's make sure we don't let history repeat itself" Stan shouted and his team looked at him "look at you guys" you called me the cynical arsehole but you are when me and Kyle were the leaders of treasure cove it kicked ass, we may have been dirty but fatass was beaten by us! So what if were uncivilized!"

"Yeah fuck them!" Craig shouted flipping the other side off, the rest cheered and did the same. Looks like his speech lifted their spirits "civilized people don't have any fun anyway, especially if fatass Cartman is their dictator trust me I should know I was on his side and I got sacrificed!" Kenny added. They cheered again.

"Down with the fatass!" Stan shouted punching the air.

"Down with the fatass!" they all repeated and did the same. Greg smiled perhaps they did stand a chance after all, especially seeing as they had Stan for their leader.

"Stupid fags" Cartman said after hearing Stan's so called pussy speech. Only Bebe and Wendy giggled but stopped when the directors and Cartman glared at them. "Well you guys are the lucky ones because you're going to be the cowboys!" Fred said

"What but some of us are girls?" Bebe asked, Wendy sighed and whispered to her best friend what Fred meant. Bebe went red and moved back. Some of the girls giggled. "Well, you're the civilized ones, so you will get better things, giving you an advantage" ted said

"Kick ass" Cartman said

"What! How is that fair?" Wendy shouted

"Why should we care, that means were gonna win!" Cartman continued. Butters and Craig muttered in agreement "because that's cheating!"

"No, it isn't because I make the rules" ted said smugly. Wendy looked at him angrily what an arsehole she thought, he's just like Cartman no wonder he likes him! "Well we count on you winning" Fred said "you're our favourites" Cartman looked just as smug as ted. To think there was a time where she actually liked him! Wendy thought and shuddered. Ted and Fred walked to the centre where Greg met them.

Ted cleared he throat and began speaking "okay, more about what's going on later, stay here for a bit because for some of you" he looked at Stan's side "it will be a long time before you see civilization again!" Craig flipped him off which made her smile but ted didn't notice "oh, and also, there is a prize for the winning side of 20,000 dollars to share" everyone's mouths dropped as the directors left.

"That should make them more eager" ted muttered

"Holy shit!" Kenny shouted "how much each?" everyone looked at Kyle as he was the smartest, but also because no one else could be bothered to work it out. "Well" Kyle said "20,000 divided by 10 that's 2000 each" all their faces lit up

"Wahoo" Kevin shouted

"That would get me so many shoes!" hadi shrieked and the other girls cheered. Stan laughed if there was one thing he learnt about girls it was that they loved shoes, he learnt that from the whole list escapade where he and Wendy had to find the truth before Kyle burnt the school down to the ground after being rated the ugliest kid in fourth grade.

"And games" Craig added and the other boys agreed

"But what that could do for my me and my family" Kenny sighed, Stan put his hand on his friends shoulder "don't worry buddy were gonna win it" Kenny faced him and smiled

"DOWN WITH THE FAT ASS!" They all shouted.

**Viva la resistance! Hehe hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Please review and I'll update soon. So peace…**


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's notes: okay long chapter but it's got lots of viewpoints in it so read on and enjoy…**

Ted picked up his radio as he walked back in the gym "okay bring in the things" suddenly there were four men walking in with two big black carrier bags in their hands. Two of them walked over to Cartman's side and the other two to Stan's side. Then they just walked off.

"Okay, in the bags are your clothes sort them out then get changed; once you're ready meet us outside the field" the directors then left them.

"Wait, we have to dress up?" Kyle asked looking worried

"And were uncivilized remember, what the hell are we going to wear!" red asked

"I don't care" Kenny said eagerly "for two grand I'll do anything!"

"Yeah dude, we know remember krazy Kenny?" Stan laughed and everyone joined in. Kenny smiled "yea I remember that was good little business part from when I got arrested" they continued to laugh. Stan bent down and picked up a bag and everyone stopped and looked….

"This should be interesting" Wendy muttered to Bebe who nodded "I wonder what the others will get" as she looked over at Stan and co.

"Yeah probably going to be some rags or something" Bebe said

"Why?"

"Caus, there uncivilized remember, so it's gonna be rags, bet they'll look sexy. They laughed. Bebe put her hands up as if she was going to take a picture of Kenny with her hands and she giggled. Wendy saw her and looked confused "Bebe what are you doing?" Bebe blushed then laughed "just picturing Kenny in some hot shredded clothes which just make him look totally hot!"

"Wait, you like Kenny now?"

"Yeah"

"What about hot ass Kyle?"

"Well he was never into me anyway, I think he would have looked at me more if I became a text book!" they both laughed because knowing Kyle that was probably true. "But Kenny always smiles at me, well I think he does, but I can never tell as his face is always covered up!"

Wendy smiled and looked over at Stan and started imagining…Stan with his scruffy black hair and in scruffy clothes which showed off his perfectly toned body. He'd look good in anything she thought with a smile.

"Oh my God what a hypocrite!" Bebe laughed, Wendy blushed but thought fast

"Wow, that's like the biggest word you've ever said!"

"Haha, but don't try to distract me, I saw what you were doing!"

"Well a girl can dream" Wendy said with a sigh.

Cartman marched up to them "will you hoe's shut the hell up!" he shouted

"Fuck off!" Bebe shouted back, Cartman looked shocked

"Hey respect my authoratai!"

"Fuck your authoratai, its authority!" she shouted, Wendy was having a laughing fit next to her. Cartman went bright red with anger "stupid hoe"

"Don't call Bebe a hoe you fat fuck!" Wendy shouted, defending her best friend. He muttered something else and walked away. "Thanks sis" Bebe smiled as they watched the fat ass move away "no problem sis" Wendy smiled. The other girls walked over to them with a two bags labelled "girls" on it. "Come on" Anne said "were gonna go to an empty room to get changed"

"Yeah don't want Kenny perving on us" Wendy added

"Wouldn't mind" Bebe muttered and only Wendy heard who shook her head

"Whore" she muttered and they both laughed. Hey walked into a room where hadi, red and the other girls on Stan's side. "You had the same idea" hadi laughed and shook their bags. Bebe nodded "come on girls let's have a look" Bebe opened a bag and gasped

"What?" they all asked, but she just laughed "well looks like there weren't saying cowboys for the sake of it!" as she pulled out a cowboy hat and put it on her head. She tipped out the contents of the bags on the ground and Cartman's side dived to find an outfit. The girls from Stan's side laughed "and they called us the uncivilized ones!" red laughed as she sat on the table to get a better look. After a few minutes that evolved shouting, arguing, trading and grabbing each girl had her outfit.

Bebe smiled contently at her outfit which consisted of: a white blouse, cream skirt matched with brown boots and topped off with her cream cowboy hat. Most of the other girls had the same as her but Wendy had found a light brown pair of trousers, cream shirt and a dark brown waistcoat matched with a brown cowgirl boots and a brown cowgirl hat

"Well that doesn't look very sexy" Bebe laughed putting her cream hat over her blonde hair

"Well it's practical, and I can always improve it, anyway I want to do things that don't involve what you see women in the movies do. Stay and cook!"

"Yeah whatever" Bebe rolled her eyes "you just wana go find Stan" Wendy blushed, that was part of her plan if she wasn't stuck inside perhaps she could go and see him.

"Our turn" red said and jumped off the table. Hadi opened the bag and also gasped "what the?" she pulled out some brown fabric, that looked like a poncho. She tipped the bag on the floor to reveal more of them including reddish leggings. They all had the same things, which made them all look like red Indians. Once they were all dressed they looked at each other. "Well, I expected potato sacks" red chuckled while looking at her new outfit. There were lots of reddish headbands on the floor so red had an idea and tied it around her waist to make her look more feminine, all the others copied her and tied the rest around their heads. "Much better" Bebe commented looking at her other friends.

"And cleaver" Wendy added "well let's wait a minute to make sure the guys are changed then we'll met them there" the other nodded.

"Or we should go now and have a look!" Bebe shouted.

"Whore!" they all shouted and laughed

"Ok, ok calm down girls" Bebe laughed "and don't worry Wendy ill sexify your outfit!" Wendy smiled.

"Well I wana talk as much as I can with my girlfriends before we split up for God knows how long!" red added. They all agreed and continued talking.

Cartman looked at his clothes and smiled. It was an all-black cowboy costume with a black cowboy hat. "Kick ass" he said. The others seemed happy too but he didn't care as long as he was happy. "I look like I'm wearing a cow!" Clyde complained

"Well duh, that's caus cowboys did!" Cartman shouted. Man he had a stupid team.

"GAUGH! I'm wearing a dead cow!" tweek shouted who also had cow print on.

"It's not real tweek, just fake stuff" butters said trying to calm him down

"Ye-ye-yeah tweek chi-chill your b-beans" jimmy added

"Timmy!" Timmy shouted. Jimmy nodded at his friend

"Gee fellas isn't this going to be cool!" butters smiled eagerly

"Dude, I look poorer than I usually do!" Kenny said but smiled at his rags aka clothes.

"Why does it have to be so…revealing" Kyle complained as he looked at his low cut shirt revealing his untoned chest.

"You think you had it bad!" Stan laughed, his shirt was ripped in two revealing his chest and it was sleeveless with jagged arm holes. Come to think of it, it was just like a jagged waist coat "I may as well not wear it!" they laughed

"I look more like a caveman!" Kenny laughed his shirt had no sleeves and it went diagonally down his chest which did look like caveman clothes. The others had rags on as well but not as revealing as them. Token and Craig picked first and managed to find two brown things which resembled t-shirts but frayed. When they tried to swap Craig would just flip them off.

"Don't we look sexy!" Kenny stated and they all laughed. "Can't wait to see what the girls have, hopefully their as revealing as Stan's!" the others agreed except Stan, he wasn't interested in any other girl except Wendy.

"Don't worry Stanny, I'll leave some for you" Kenny said rubbing his hands "they'll go to you first caus of your figure!" he laughed

"Yeah, not all of us are that blessed" Kyle muttered

"Well maybe instead of studying 24/7 you should play some sport and you'll look like Stan!" Kenny pointed out

"You guys STOP! You're starting to sound really gay!" Stan shouted, Kenny laughed it off while Kyle went as red as his hair.

"Oh Stan don't you like the attention?" Kenny said in a gay voice. Stan slapped him around the head and they started play fighting and laughing. The others crowded round and laughed at them. But stopped when the door opened. Kenny and Stan broke apart. "Here come the girls" Kenny said rubbing his hands together. Stan looked as he saw his team walk up to the boys, looking them up and down. They didn't look bad, they wore reddish leggings and baggy brown tops but they tied headbands around their waists to show off their figures. He saw Kyle staring at red and red staring at Kyle, what was going on there he thought? But what shocked him the most was Kenny. He should be in heaven looking at all the girls but his attention was just on one. Stan looked for the girl. It was Bebe; she had a cream cowgirl hat on with a white blouse and cream shirt which was shorter than everyone else's. She smiled at Kenny and he gave her a weird smile back which made her giggle. Kenny was acting strange not being a stud, but goofier and….in love. Wow, when did that happen? He was about to ask when he saw Wendy.

She was wearing brown trousers and a cream shirt with a dark brown waist coat like what the guys had only hers was more fitted so it showed off her figure and her dark brown hat toped it off. She didn't look girly but she looked stunning. Not the stupid housewife in the cowboy movies but the kick ass gunslinger not afraid of the action. So like Wendy he thought. Before he knew what was doing he had already ran over to greet her.

"Hey" Wendy turned from Bebe to see Stan and she nearly fell over and she heard Bebe gasp. It was like she was daydreaming again. Bebe looked but then ran off saying something that Wendy couldn't hear. "Umm hey" she smiled and tried not to stare but she couldn't help it. He just looked so, hot! His hair was scruffy and stuck out as his trademark hat was taken off and replaced with a headband but it looked perfect, his shirt was really revealing. It was shredded and had no sleeves which showed off his muscular arms but the shirt was ripped in two at the front, it must have had a chunk cut out as it revealed his entire chest, showing off his six pack and perfectly toned body. She had to snap out of it "so" she asked trying to distract herself "looks like they ran out of money when they came to getting your clothes!" crap! Why would I mention that, bet that didn't sound strange! But instead he laughed "I know yeah, I think I came off the worst. I mean look at this!" he said grabbing his shirt "I mean I may as well not wear anything!"

"Humm" she liked the idea of that and she nearly spoke her thoughts if she hadn't stopped herself. "Well you look really…" he mumbled

"I look stupid don't I" she said and looked down, why she didn't just put the girlie stuff on.

"NO! It looks really cool" he smiled "just like kick ass Wendy"

"So why did you mumble?" she asked still not convinced

"Caus I was gonna say" he looked at his fur boots "pretty"

She blushed "thanks" he smiled at her then edged closer to her and she could feel his warmth, she held her breath and closed her eyes.

But the perfect moment was totally ruined when Cartman walked over "Oi, hoe get your ass back here!" he ordered.

"Don't call her a whore you fucking asshole!" Stan shouted clenching his fists. She was flattered that even after anything he still stood up for her. Cartman looked him up and down. "Nice rags, I see Kenny looking poorer than usual!" he laughed at his own comment.

"I see you look fatter than usual" Stan replied bitterly. Nice Wendy thought. But they both walked up to each other giving each other evil looks

"Well see ya Stan" Wendy said trying to stop things before Cartman and Stan started something. "Oh okay bye" he smiled again. They both parted ways and walked back to their groups. Cartman muttered some insult but Wendy didn't bother to reply. Bebe and the girls ran over to Wendy, talking about how the boys looked.

"Oh my God did you see Kenny! He looked so cute" Bebe shrieked the other girls chatted about him and Craig. "No" Wendy answered truthfully, she'd been distracted by Stan.

"Obviously, she was drooling over Stan!" Annie said loudly, Wendy quickly silenced her and went red.

"Well it's true; when you saw Stan you nearly fainted!" Bebe added mocking her. She went even redder "well he looks hot!" Wendy's eyes widened as the others agreed.

"I, I thought you liked Kenny?" Wendy asked

"Yeah I'm just stating a fact" Bebe said

"Yeah he does look hot" Wendy repeated

"Kenny, dude what the hell!" Stan said. Kenny looked blankly at him

"What?" he asked Stan raised his eyebrows, is that was he looked when he saw Wendy?

"You were giving a goofy smile to Bebe, do you like her?" he asked

"No! Did you see her big boobs" Kenny said quickly, with a smile

"Don't lie Ken"

"Maybe, i duno, it was weird when I see girls I think about fucking them but when I saw Bebe" he smiled Stan fell into a fit of laughter but Kenny just glared at him but Stan didn't care "dude! You like her!" Kenny went red, now that Kenny wasn't wearing his hoodie Stan saw how easy to read Kenny was. Maybe that's why he covers up.

"Hey guys" Kyle said

"And you! What's going on?" Stan asked but before Kyle could answer "and don't play dumb! I'm on about you staring at red!" Kyle did a goofy smile too. Damn did he really look like that when he thought about Wendy? "I was just admiring her"

"Liar that's what Kenny does"

"Yeah, that's what I do" Kenny repeated "you're the good one"

"Augh" Kyle gave up as he was outnumbered "well I think I like her" Stan burst out laughing again. This was just to funny "so you guys ripped on me when I liked Wendy and now you're doing the same, this is gonna be sweet revenge" Kenny and Kyle looked at each other

"Do we do that goofy smile, like what you did?" Kyle asked

"Damn I looked like that!" Stan moaned "I thought it was just you two" they all looked at each other and laughed.

**Hahaha hope you enjoyed that, because I enjoyed writing it. Please review and I will update soon. Peace out XD**


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's notes: hey again, long time no see. I think I forgot about this story hehe. But to make it up to you all I have wrote a big ass chapter so with that enjoy…**

On the field

"Dude thank God it summer time, caus otherwise we would freeze" Kyle said as they walked down the field. Stan nodded. He saw the three directors a few feet away and there were more bags! They all lined up in there groups. This time Fred stepped forward to speak "now in these bags you will find your weapons"

"Finally" Cartman said

"So will the leaders step forward" Stan and Cartman did as they were told and moved closer to the directors. Cartman grinned at Fred "now" Fred continued "each team gets different types of weapons" all the boy's ears pricked up "these weapons are powerful and can harm people if not used safely" augh not another boring safety speech Stan thought a few others groaned on cue of his thoughts. "This will be team Cartman's weapons" he said as he bent down and ruffled through a bag and pulled out a shotgun and a handgun. "Sweet" Cartman commented others gasped as well. "But these are just dart guns" Fred continued "so they can't kill just knockout"

"What!" Cartman shouted and eyes widened "well what's the point of shooting if I ant kill the god damn Jew!" Kyle grunted, but others complained as well. Fred looked at Cartman "well if you killed someone on public television, it would get bad views and the show would get axed anyway…"

He continued to talking about guns and safety nut Stan stopped listening for three reasons:

1) It was as boring as hell

2) They weren't even his weapons so why the hell should he listen

3) He couldn't get Wendy out of his head!

He glanced back and saw her take in everything she was being told, she was smart and as usual she always listened. He quickly turned back round and acted natural to make sure no-one could see him or get suspicious. After a few minutes, that seemed like forever the speech had finished. There were a few yawns, but that wasn't unexpected, after all it was as boring as hell!

Cartman walked forward and grabbed the bag full of weapons and walked back to his group, who all seemed to move off and pass the weapons around. Someone with a gun was scary but a crazy idiot with a gun was even worse. But Cartman with a gun was what scared him the Stan the most. Dear God. He muttered.

Cartman grabbed two hand guns and tied a holster around his belly and put the guns in them. He did look, totally sweet. Now bitches would have to respect his authoratai! He left the rest on the floor for the other guys to get. "Only one though" he said

"Why?" Clyde asked

"Because I fucking said so, that's why!" he shouted

"B-b-but you hav-ve two?" jimmy asked. Cartman sighed did he have to explain everything to these idiots. "Well, I'm the leader so I have to have more to be powerful and stuff" he then picked up a shotgun. "GAH! Now you have three!" tweek screamed.

"Oi, just respect my authoratai!" he shouted and pointed the shotgun at them; they soon turned away and picked a gun up. Butters a pistol along with tweek and Clyde, jimmy and Timmy had shotguns. His team will defiantly Stan's! And he would shoot Kyle to pieces! Then there would be one less Jew in the world! His great thoughts were interrupted when he saw Wendy bend down and pick up a pistol and put in her holster which was already around her, what the fuck was she doing!? "Oi, what are you doing?" he shouted, she just stared at him blankly "what?" she asked. Did this hoe think there was nothing wrong with what she was doing? "Put the gun back" he said assertively, showing off his authority.

"No" she said flatly. Now he was getting pissed

"Put the gun back, you don't need it"

"Yeah I do"

"No you don't"

"Yes, I can have one if I want one" augh, what was with her!

"No bitch, put the gun down and keep your ass in the kitchen to make me a pot pie!" he shouted, she marched up to him but he held his ground. "No, I will not, I have every right to have a gun just as much as anyone else!"

"But you're a girl" he wined

"So what fatass!" she shouted "I'm a girl who whooped your ass in fourth grade!" augh bitch, that brought back painful memories. He could see her getting angrier by the second and her fists were clenched, he thought she was going to hit him. But then the stupid pony tail guy walked over to them.

"What's up?" he asked

"Nothing, apart from the fact that fact this hoe has a gun!" he stated, was the director stupid? "Don't call me a hoe!" she shouted

"What's wrong with her having a gun?" the director asked. Cartman's mouth opened

"Well obviously caus she's a girl!"

"So" they both said. Cartman couldn't believe what he was hearing, had the world gone mad? "Let her have it"

"No" he whined "I'm the leader"

"And I'm the director, so she keeps it" he said. Who the fuck did he think he is? Showing off his authoratai! Wendy smiled at the hippy but glared at him before walking off. The hippy did the same. "God damn it!" he shouted.

Stan laughed when he heard Cartman, stupid fatass, just because Wendy was a girl didn't mean she couldn't have a gun. He was about to kick his fat ass but Greg walked over; ha he put that stupid asshole in place! He was beginning to like that guy more and more.

"Dude, what are you doing?" Kyle asked

"Just laughing caus Cartman got put in his place by Greg" he answered truthfully, and laughed again and this time Kyle joined in. "yeah I know. At least we have one director on our side" Greg walked back to the centre and smiled at Stan who nodded back, Greg knew it was a thank you and nodded back. Kyle took a step back and joined the other member of his group. Leaving Stan at the front.

"Okay" Fred said "get ready for you weapons" he laughed and ted joined in. Greg shook his head. Oh no, Stan thought, what shit do we have now he thought, probably a stick or something. Fred stopped and bent down and picked something out of the bag. It looked like a stick but was hollow probably 15cm (size of a small ruler)

"What is that?" Craig asked. Fred grinned at him

"Your weapon" he answered

"So how the hell do we use it? Beat them to unconscious?" Kenny said sarcastically

"No it's a blow pipe" Greg interrupted because ted and Fred were in hysterics. "I did warn you about this" he added. Stan smiled, it was the only thing he could do and he also had a funny image of them all attacking Cartman with the sticks "is there anything else?" he asked. Greg thought for a moment and then pulled out a traditional long bow made of oak. "That's better" red said "I can use them"

"How?" Kyle asked

"I had lessons" she replied

"Well duh" Kenny said "what did you think? She was a re-incarnation of an Indian?" the others laughed while Kyle went red. But red glared at Kenny "shut up" she hissed

"Okay calm down guys" Stan said everyone quietened down "thank you, now does everyone know how to use at least one of these things?" they all nodded.

"Yeah" Kevin said "it's like Indiana Jones with those blowpipes" the other boys shuddered. Stan didn't want to remember that painful memory of watching Indiana Jones getting raped. A few of the girls looked confused but they had never seen it. Stan pushed those memories back and grabbed the bags. "Thanks" he said to Greg then walked off to an open space and emptied a bag out. Everyone rushed over to get something. "Any limit on how many we can have?" hadi asked "I mean we all heard Cartman"

"Well I aint fatass" Stan stated "just take what you want but make sure everyone has something, boys and girls" he added. Then they all dived down. He picked up a large bow made of dark oak, which he hung over his shoulder. He also picked up a blow pipe, seeing as there were so many. It could come in handy he thought. "Come on girls, you don't need them, you can always blow on something else" Kenny grinned. The girls looked at him in disgust. Stan smacked him around the head with the pipe. "Looks like it did come in handy" he muttered. A different bag contained arrows and darts for the blowpipe. He grabbed another bag and emptied it, there were belts and arm guards, and he quickly saw a blue flint guard and quickly strapped it on his left arm. The others were just grey and Kyle laughed at him "oh fashionable, you becoming metrosexual again?" he asked Stan just laughed "nahh I like blue" he tied a belt around his trousers, it had a holder for the pipe and a little brown pouch for the darts, they didn't look much but one prick from it and you were out for the count, he then slung a red leather arrow hold over his back which was full of blue arrows, there were other colours but he did like blue. Everything seemed co-ordinated, red leather belt and arrow holder which were the same colour as his head band and blue arrow feathers and armguard even the darts had blue streaks!

He looked around, all the guys had bows and all the girls bar red and hadi had blowpipes because as Milly said "they couldn't be arsed to carry a big bow with them" Greg walked over to them "good to see you all kitted out" he said

"Wasn't as bad as I thought it would be" Kyle said and others nodded

"Yeah, I thought we were going to have sticks or something" Kenny added. Greg walked up to Stan "I also came to give you this" he said and handed Stan a dagger. It was blue flint like his armguard but jagged to make it deadly, it was fitted into a wooden hilt with brown leather strap to hold it in place and for comfort. It looked awesome, and was blue! "You are the leader, and they did have a weapon to show their power" Stan smiled and held it in his hand admiring it. "plus you never know, you might need" he smiled at Stan thanks was all he could say back, the others walked over to see "sweet" Kevin said and the others agreed. Stan then noticed that on his belt there was a holder for the dagger so he sheathed it. Wow this belt had it all. There was even storage space for whatever the hell you wanted! Sweet was an understatement, freakin awesome! That was better. "This is cool" he muttered.

Greg cleared his throat and they all turned around to face him "I have also come here to tell you the rules of the game and how to play"

"Augh rules" Kenny moaned "that's a kill joy!"

"Yeah" token added

"But what so you mean, how to play?" Kyle asked, clearly interested, trust him to want to know everything Stan thought. He looked over and saw ted and Fred talking to the other team, he quickly averted his eyes before he saw Wendy because he didn't want to stare and do the stupid goofy face; so he put his full concentration on to what Greg was saying who seemed to be answering Kyle's question, he tuned out it sounded boring, I'll listen when he gets to the rules he thought…

"Now about the rules…" Stan's ears pricked up "no smoking or drinking alcohol"

"Augh come on were in sixth grade where we gonna get that from!" Kevin said but Greg just shrugged. "I didn't make them up and no sex either" Kenny groaned loudly

"Really?" this time Kyle slapped him around the head lightly

"Come on dude, remember the money" he whispered Kenny nodded and smiled

"You are not allowed to be helped by anyone outside of this game, and you can't communicate with anyone but yourselves" then Stan suddenly remembered

"What about the other team? Can we, like communicate?" he asked

"No stupid were mortal enemies now" Craig stated

Greg shrugged "well, I wouldn't see why you would need to talk or anything…"*cough*Wendy*cough* Kenny and Kyle coughed Stan kicked them and they laughed quietly. Greg saw and smiled "oh, well it's not in the rules so do whatever" Stan nodded "also you have to listen to your leader, he is the boss" Stan smiled evilly and faced his group.

"Yeah, respect ma authoratai!" he shouted in his Cartman voice. They all laughed even Greg. "I do feel sorry for those who have to listen to fatass" Kyle said they all nodded.

"Poor people" Craig muttered

"And finally you are not allowed to leave the game premises" Greg finished

"Where is it anyway?" red asked

"Yeah, how do we even know if we are in or out?" hadi added. Greg grinned

"Follow me, I will show you now and explain more once we get there" he strolled off; Stan and his group ran after him, Kenny and Kyle walked up to Stan. "You got everything?" Stan asked mocking his friend; Kyle nodded "I take it you never!" Stan grinned and shook his head "and your our leader!" they all laughed and Stan play punched him and Kyle yelped "God help us!" Kenny said dramatically. Stan rolled his eyes

"Come on guys have faith! Better me your leader than Cartman!"

"Agreed" they all said in unison.

**Ta-dah hope you enjoyed it, please review so I know what you think and with that peace out… **


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